Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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