I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
one might say we're banned from that church
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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