I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize