another moral hangover. fuck.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
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