I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
porn star boner night. come get it.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
