Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
