i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
