No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
