lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize