The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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