I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
