Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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