wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
