hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Randomize