Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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