but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you didnt know i had herpes?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I don't deserve a penis
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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