she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize