Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just invented taco cereal.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
