i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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