I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
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I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
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You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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