I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
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If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
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I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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