Cold hands, warm shart.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
