There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
My liver is preforming stress tests.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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