i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
