He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
