Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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