alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Randomize
