the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
