What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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