did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
