dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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