Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
its not stalking. its research.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
