If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I want a musical about memes.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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