I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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