apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize