So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
