Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
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He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
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i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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