What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize