HIV tests are more positive than that guy
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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