hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize