OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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