Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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