Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
