road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later