i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
