anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
