I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
