who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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