the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
