sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
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