I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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