someone get that fucking seahorse.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize